Some Recent Classics... :-))

A random selection of recent memorable dreams:

• Being kidnapped by a millionaire Arab sheik who was collecting beautiful wives from all over the world and having to live in luxury in a corner of his palace, dress up in gorgeous Bollywood style attire, and have fun socialising with all his other kidnapped wives at communal meals each day. No wonder I was a bit gutted when the guy later decided all these women in his house were just too much hassle, and had a competition for the most beautiful one he’d then go on to keep (Jennifer Aniston won).
• Meeting Dizzee Rascal for dinner via expats.cz and getting invited to stand at the front of his gig later that evening, pulling, and then the next day running into my colleague Misa (a fellow fan) who was all like OMFG Sarah how did you manage to hook up with Dizzee, and I was like, yeah, check me, scored with the Rascal... :-)) (Neither of us speak like airhead, celeb-obsessed teenagers in real life, btw.)
• Unexpectedly going out for dinner and cocktails with the Sex in the City girls, but feeling horribly embarrassed as hadn't known to get all dressed up accordingly...
• Johnny Vaughan asking me to join the Breakfast Show to replace Lisa Snowdon. Apart from the early starts, that surely must be one of the best jobs in the world…
• Finding myself a pre-fame 50 Cent's baby mama and going on the run with him to Brno...
• Having to write an English Lit (which I never studied) university exam on supposed Czech classic 'The Good Soldier Svejk' (which I never read), but getting disqualified for writing my conclusion on toilet paper and had to beg the course tutor to turn a blind eye...
• Having to read a book reminiscent of both 'Catcher in the Rye' and Max Frisch's 'Andorra', and write an essay on it for my boss. Unfortunately the book only exists in my head and was something to do with alienation and discrimination experienced by foreigners within the Czech Republic.
• Finding that the database I manage at work was a white kite, which needed testing by flying from the top of a high hill, and one day experienced functionality so uncharacteristically high that the force nearly pulled me from my feet... In real life you’d have trouble getting the damn thing to stay in the air…
• Discovering “Princess Diaries” style that I had actually been fathered by the King of the Fairies and was going to get to rule over the alternate universe of the fairy folk and get wings. Quite miffed when woke up that wasn’t the case.
• The Sorting Hat putting me in Slytherin, and somehow not being in the least bit surprised.
• Serving as Barack Obama’s designated mistress for the EMEA region (well, Michelle can’t travel everywhere with him, can she… ;-)) ). Haven’t been able to look at him in the same light since...

Oh if only real life was so interesting...